There are no words to describe the heartbreak I have felt over the last week and a half watching my dear sister in law go through the loss of her little boy. I feel my own sadness and heartache for the loss of a darling nephew and favorite cousin to my kids. But my own sadness seems insignificant compared to what I have felt for Crystal. My heart seems to have broken a thousand times over the last week. I feel as though her pain must be the sadness I have felt over my Mom's death multiplied ten times. I cannot imagine having to bury my son at 8 years old. I want to write down my thoughts and feelings, but most are too much for my blog (don't want all my friends to be so entirely bummed you never want to see what's happening with us again:) So here is just a small glimpse of the week in pictures...
The morning after Todd's passing, Ryan and I spent the morning with Jeff, Crystal and the kids. Brooke had written this note out on the back patio.
I made this sign to hang in their yard and painted the kids hands so they could each put their hand prints on. Todd's cousins Bridger, Pierson, and Madi, Brother Matthew, cousin Thatcher, and twin sister Brooke. Yes Madi has her shirt off along with the boys. They were completely filthy and wet when we left, but this week it was- anything goes. At least the kids were having fun. 
My wonderful sister in law, DeAnna, made this wreath from Todd's siblings. Brooke and Matthew loved picking out candy for Todd. It was the sweetest thing! Darling displays of Todd for the funeral and viewing (also put up by wonderful DeAnna)
The funeral was beautiful, uplifting and completely heartbreaking all in one. What a tribute to a very special little boy.
Todd's Dad, Jeff, and Uncles Ryan, Mark, Steve and Gregg
After the dedication of the grave we released red (Todd's favorite color) balloons...
So perfect.
My Madi putting a flower on Toddy's casket
Sweet Brooke- my heart breaks even more for her to lose her twin brother
The Beautiful Hall Family - Jeff, Crystal, Brooke, Matthew, Harrison and Baby Dallin, beside their precious Todd (glad that Matthew thinks all is well) 
Ryan and I wanted to do something special from the aunts and uncles and cousins, we thought a train was perfect for Todd. I was happy it turned out so great!
We went back to the cemetery in the evening after Todd was buried, here is Brooke and Matthew on the Todd trainNow that the funeral is over is seems so unreal. Like it was all a bad dream. I can't believe little Todd is really gone and that Crystal has lost one of her twins. I am so thankful for the blessing of temple marriage and eternal families. Jeff and Crystal have been so amazingly strong this week, they have been so uplifted and I know Heavenly Father has blessed them greatly. Because of the gospel of Jesus Christ they will get through this, we all will. Although the knowledge we will be with our families forever is a great comfort, we still have to get through the rest of our lives with out them. This is the hard part. We know he is with Jesus and he is happy, but even so, the weeks, months and years to come will be hard and full of tears for the loss of this precious little boy.
19 comments:
i am so sorry. i can't imagine. our prayers are with your entire family.
What a beautiful tribute. I'll be praying for the healing to continue with all of the sweet family.
Josie,
Tyler and I have just been so sad for your family. I can't even imagine the pain you must be feeling. Just reading your post brought me to tears... We have been praying for Todd's beautiful family, and we are just so thankful for the Gospel. We will continue to pray for your whole family.
These pictures will be precious memories for you. Sweet, sweet family. They will be in my prayers for a long time.
my heart aches for them and for you. what beautiful pictures to keep the memories of the day. you are in our prayers.
Oh Jos, I was brought to tears so many times reading through your post. The picture of the hand on the casket is awesome. That is my worst fear, losing one of my little ones at a young age. My heart goes out to you and especially your sister-in-law. Definitely would be one of the hardest things to go through ever.
What a beautiful tribute to Todd, Josie. Thanks for honoring such a wonderful and special boy. You have such a strong spirit that helps so many others. I admire you greatly with your eternal perspective. You have had to endure so much. I continue to pray for you and all of your family.
That was beautiful Josie, thanks so much for sharing. I can't even imagine, I have been in my own turmoil over it and I barely even know them. It is just so sad. The pictures you got are precious. And everything you said was perfect. It is true we have so much to be thankful for but it is still going to be rough for them and you all of you as the years go by. You of all people know that. Our prayers will continue to be with you/them. That one pic of the sun and the balloons is so great. Love you guys.
This is so beautiful- so tender and heartbreaking. The tears just keep coming as I think of having to let go of this precious little boy. There is peace and comfort too, because of our Savior and His gospel. What an amazing family to share their testimony with such faith during this most difficult time. Our prayers and love continue to be with you all. I am always so grateful, Josie, for your example of faithfulness and strength and the hope and joy you bring to everyone around you. You are so dear to me!
Josie, thank you for sharing these pictures. Wish I could have been there. You all have been in my prayers and thoughts.
Love, Lisa
Josie, what a beautiful tribute to Todd. My heart goes out to your whole family. I can't imagine the loss. The grief. The pain. They are in my prayers and thoughts daily. Thank you for sharing....
That is such a beautiful tribute. They are such a sweet family. I cannot eve imagine what they have gone through. My heart breaks for them and your family! We are so lucky to have the gospel. Are prayers are with your entire family.
We have been praying for so many people lately but you guys have been included. Bev told me what happened, that is so sad. I hope things start to look happier soon. For all of us.
Josie. Sweet Josie. You did such a great job articulating how the week has been. I almost couldn't bring myself to read this post. I have been so sad about this since hearing the news. I bawled on and off for several days thinking about Crystal. She is so lucky to have you and Ryan and so many others who love her and will be there for her. You have all been in our prayers. Please let me know if there is ANYTHING I can do. I love you so much and it breaks my heart that all of you have had to go through this.
Wow, what an amazing and beautiful tribute. I also have a broken heart but am feeling so blessed to have been able to attend the funeral.
What a great family you are!!
Love you guys
Jo,
I continue to pray for the entire Robison/Hall family every day. As we both know, there are many more hard times ahead. I am just so grateful for the gospel in our lives. I love that we know where we are going. I love you and am honored to have you as my sister.
I guess I've been trying to think of the words to say. I can't begin to imagine letting one of my little ones go. You love your nieces and nephews as your own and I can't imagine losing on of my own. I'm so truly sorry and I hope with time, your aching hearts will heal. I think its so wonderful all the love an support you have been giving your sweet bro and sis in law by getting the word out and doing the fundraisers. They need support like you right now. To take the lead and to let them mourn. Again, so sorry Josie. Sure love ya.
Josie, I also have been thinking of something I could say... there is nothing but shock and sorrow for your family. It was awesome to hear Tod's father speak at Stake Conference and to hear the power come from his spirit, Thane was saying that he sounded like an apostle, with how strong his spirit was and how perfect his words were. He is an inspiration to all of us. What a strong and loving family. We love you and have continually prayed for your family. Thanks for the amazing pictures!
My goodness, Jo. This is heartbreaking......
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